Reclaiming Your Healthcare: How to Navigate Doctor Appointments as a Person in a Larger Body
Blog Post by Contributing Editor Gabrielle Katz, LCSW, CEDS-C
Going to the doctor is stressful for many people, but for individuals in larger bodies, it can be particularly challenging. The weight stigma prevalent in our society often finds its way into healthcare settings, creating trauma for people who are already dealing with the emotional and physical consequences of discrimination. The medical field has historically been weight-centric, assuming that someone’s weight is the root cause of their health concerns. This weight bias can lead to harmful assumptions, mistreatment, and even neglect of proper medical care. As a result, individuals in larger bodies may feel hesitant or fearful about seeking medical help, knowing that their concerns may be dismissed or minimized due to their body size.
Weight Stigma in Healthcare: Harmful Effects
“Fat-related trauma often starts early. It starts in the family, and continues the minute you turn on the television or access the internet.” – Denarii Grace
This quote from activist Denarii Grace highlights the reality of the trauma experienced by individuals in larger bodies from an early age. From family dynamics to media portrayals, messages about body size are pervasive, constantly reinforcing the idea that larger bodies are inferior or unhealthy. This trauma doesn’t only affect adults—children and adolescents in larger bodies face similar biases, internalizing harmful messages about themselves at a young age.
From childhood through adulthood, the experience of seeking medical care can be fraught with anxiety and fear of judgment. For children and teens, these experiences are formative and can influence their relationship with healthcare as they grow older. For many, the emotional impact of weight stigma can make it harder to trust medical professionals and advocate for their health needs. It can even make it hard for someone to make an appointment or go to the doctor for any medical concern.
For individuals in larger bodies, doctor’s appointments are often anxiety-inducing due to a medical system that focuses on weight rather than the actual health concern. Weight bias and stigma are pervasive in healthcare, with many professionals prioritizing weight loss over addressing the patient’s symptoms. Instead of investigating the root cause of a health issue, doctors often default to recommending weight loss or using BMI (body mass index) as the primary focus of treatment.
This approach is incredibly harmful, reinforcing fatphobia. Weight loss is frequently presented as a one-size-fits-all solution, even when it’s irrelevant to the patient’s concerns. As a result, many leave appointments feeling dismissed, misdiagnosed, or misunderstood, with their true health issues ignored because of their size. The emotional toll of this bias can lead to feelings of shame, frustration, and a sense of hopelessness.
Radical Acceptance: Reclaiming Our Bodies
Radical Acceptance, a concept from Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), involves fully accepting the present moment without judgment or resistance. It’s about recognizing that while we may not like a situation, resisting it only adds to our suffering. In the context of navigating doctor’s appointments as a person in a larger body, Radical Acceptance can be empowering. The medical system may not always be weight-inclusive, and facing weight bias during a visit can be difficult, but Radical Acceptance helps us accept that reality without internalizing shame or self-blame. It allows us to focus on how we respond—advocating for ourselves, setting boundaries, and finding healthcare professionals who provide respectful, weight-neutral care. By accepting ourselves as we are, we can release the emotional burden of feeling powerless and take proactive steps toward receiving the care we deserve.
As someone navigating the world in a larger body, it is essential to move away from internalized fatphobia and embrace radical acceptance. It’s important to remember that your body, regardless of its size, deserves love, respect, and care. Self-love and appreciation are integral to healing from the trauma caused by a weight-centric society.
Radical acceptance means recognizing that your body is not something to be fixed, that it is not a problem that needs solving. It means challenging the cultural norms that tell you that being in a larger body is inherently unhealthy. When you can begin to shift your perspective and let go of shame, it becomes easier to take up space, advocate for your needs, and demand the healthcare you deserve.
Self-love doesn’t mean perfection — it means embracing yourself as you are, without needing validation from the outside world. It’s about acknowledging that your worth is not tied to your body size. As you nurture a more loving relationship with yourself, you can better navigate the challenges of the healthcare system with confidence and clarity.
Taking Control: How to Navigate Doctor Appointments
The next step is equipping yourself with the tools to navigate doctor’s appointments effectively and with confidence. Here are some tips for standing up for yourself and ensuring that you receive the care you deserve, focused on your health and well-being:
You Have the Right to Say No: If a doctor recommends something you don’t agree with, especially if it’s solely based on your weight or size, you have the right to say no. This includes refusing to be weighed if it’s not medically relevant to the issue at hand. You are not obligated to discuss your weight or have it recorded unless it directly affects your care. Your health is about more than a number, and you have control over what happens during your appointment.
Challenge Weight-Centric Recommendations: If your doctor suggests weight loss or talks about BMI as an indicator of your health, ask questions. You have every right to inquire: “If I were in a smaller body, would your recommendation be the same or different?” This can help uncover whether the recommendation is truly necessary for your health or if it is based solely on bias.
Bring a Support Person: If you feel anxious or unsure about navigating the appointment on your own, consider bringing a supportive friend, family member, or advocate with you. They can help ensure your voice is heard and assist in advocating for your needs.
Have Notes and Prepare Speaking Points: Before your appointment, write down any symptoms, concerns, or questions you want to discuss with your doctor and bring it to your appointment. This will help you stay focused during the visit and ensure that you don’t forget to address important points.
Get a Second Opinion: If you feel dismissed or uncomfortable with a doctor’s advice or treatment plan, don’t hesitate to seek a second opinion. It’s your health, and you deserve to find a healthcare provider who listens to you and values your concerns.
Find Fat-Positive and HAES® Doctors: Not all healthcare providers are steeped in weight-centric practices. Look for fat-positive or HAES® (Health at Every Size) doctors who prioritize holistic, individualized care. These professionals focus on health behaviors and well-being, rather than body size, and are committed to providing compassionate and nonjudgmental care.
Provide Education: In some cases, you may find that providing education to your doctor about HAES® practices, or your desire to focus on health without emphasizing weight loss, can help your doctor better understand your needs. If weight loss is not an option for you, let your doctor know ahead of time so that they can focus on finding other solutions to address your health concerns.
Proactive Disclaimer: At the start of your appointment, you can choose to share with your doctor that you’ve had negative experiences with healthcare providers in the past. Let them know that previous doctors have focused solely on your weight and didn’t listen to your symptoms. By sharing this upfront, you can set the expectation that you hope for a different experience—one where your health concerns are treated with respect and addressed thoroughly.
Practice Patience and Compassion: Navigating the healthcare system as a person in a larger body requires practice. It’s important to be patient and compassionate with yourself as you learn how to advocate for your needs. Don’t expect change overnight—it takes time to shift our own internalized shame, internalized societal messages, and internalized beliefs about body size and health.
Ultimately, you have the right to say no to weight-centric recommendations and to be treated with dignity and respect. Your body, regardless of size, deserves appropriate and thorough medical care that focuses on your actual health concerns, not just your weight.
Navigating the medical world as a person in a larger body can be challenging, and it is possible to advocate for yourself with the right tools and mindset. By moving away from internalized fatphobia, embracing radical acceptance, and preparing yourself with practical steps for each appointment, you can approach doctor’s visits with confidence, knowing you deserve the best possible care—care that goes beyond weight or body size-related recommendations.
Gabrielle Katz, LCSW, CEDS-C
Owner/Therapist, Coastal Collaborative Care
About the Contributor: Gabrielle “Gabby” Katz (she/her) is the owner of Coastal Collaborative Care, a therapy practice that specializes in the treatment of eating disorders, depressive disorders, anxiety disorders, and trauma. Gabby received her MSW at the University of Pennsylvania. She is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW) offering therapy to clients in Virginia, Maryland, Washington, D.C., Massachusetts, Colorado, and Tennessee. She also provides LCSW supervision for clinicians pursuing their clinical license in Virginia. Due to her extensive experience in working in the eating disorder treatment field, she received the Certified Eating Disorders Specialist and Approved Consultant (CEDS-C) certification from the International Association of Eating Disorder Professionals (iaedp). This certification symbolizes her advanced knowledge and expertise in eating disorder care, and a part of this certification also qualifies her to supervise clinicians seeking this certification. In addition to her expertise in eating disorders, Gabby is trained in trauma therapy, including EMDR, IFS, and the Flash Technique (FT).